Decisions Regretted, Lessons Learnt
by maybewesortoosoon
Summary: Sometimes, people make bad decisions, yet those who learn from them, were not always the decision maker in the first place.


"I want - I want to leave Hogwarts." Lily spoke up, breaking the silence at the Potter's dinner table.

James gagged on the potato he was chewing on. Albus whacked him on the back, whilst staring at his sister in astonishment.

"Have you gone crazy?" James choked out.

"Or perhaps you've been hit by one Bludger too many?" Albus joked.

"Takes one to know one." Lily retorted.

Harry glanced at his wife, who was looking at her daughter, an expression of curiousity and surprise on Ginny's face.

"Lily. Not now, hmm? We'll can talk about this later. "

Lily huffed slightly, and returned to pushing her food around her plate.

"Eat something." Ginny said gently to Lily.

Lily shoveled some beef into her mouth. She chewed it, mouth wide open, and swallowed.

"Use your manners." sighed Ginny.

James and Albus hurried up the stairs as soon as dinner was over.

"Some things never change." muttered Ginny.

Her youngest child seemed to be so different from the rest of the family. Lily hated to spend time with the large Weasley family. She was a real prankster. Some of her teachers said that she must be Fred Weasley incarnate. Even to her parents, Lily was somewhat of a mystery.

"Go on upstairs, dear. Your father and I can handle the dishes tonight."

"Just don't start shagging each other." Lily shot at her mother, as she rushed out of the dining room.

Ginny blushed slightly, at the memory of James walking into the kitchen during one, well, heated, snogging session.

Harry nudged his wife. "Knut for your thoughts?"

"Only the equivalent of Lily's Hogwarts tuition." she joked.

Harry exhaled. "Why would she want to leave? She's never indicated that she's had any particularly bad experiences there."

Ginny shrugged. "Who knows?" she sneaked a glance at her husband as she dried a plate. "She's like you, you know?"

"How so?"

"If she wants something to be known, she'll make sure it is. Otherwise, everything is kept hidden by a careful mask."

"We'll have to talk to her later." Harry responded, ignoring Ginny's comment.

"When?"

"Tomorrow. After she gets back from one of her French classes."

"She never has shown much interest in things to do with magic, has she?"

"Not really, no." The couple descended into a brooding silence.

* * *

Ginny glanced at the clock in her office at _The Daily Prophet_.

"I've got to go home for a few hours. Think you can hold down the fort for that long?" she grinned at Roger Davies, the junior editor of the Prophet's Quidditch section.

"Yes mother." Roger grinned at Ginny cheekily.

* * *

Harry sat in his study, attempting to get some paper work done.

He heard the front door open.

"Lily?" he called out.

"It's me!" Ginny responded. "Lily should be home soon." She appeared in the doorway of the study. "Want some lunch?"

Harry's stomach rumbled and Ginny laughed.

"I'll take that as a yes."

* * *

Lily stepped off the train and hurried home. She knew her parents would be waiting for her when she got home.

"Half the bloody family probably knows about it by now." she muttered grumpily, kicking a pebble off the path leading up to the Potter's front door.

She unlocked the door and slipped inside.

"Lily!" her mum smiled, with a slightly forced air of cheeriness. "How was your day?"

"Alright." Lily shrugged.

Harry closed his eyes momentarily. He wished it would be easier for him to get to know his children. He always felt somewhat distant from them; as if he didn't know how to relate to them.

"No point in mincing words, eh?" he said, opening his eyes. "Why do you want to leave Hogwarts?"

Lily answered quickly, prepared for her response. "Because I don't want this. Any of this. I don't want to be a witch."

"What do you mean?" Ginny frowned.

"Look how many problems there are in the wizarding world. Look at Scorpius' family. The wizarding world is so backwards. If I want to instantly get a message to someone, I have to send a Patronus. Do you know how hard it is to conjure one?" she laughed bitterly.

"I thought you were good-" Harry interrupted.

"I am. But I'm not so blind to everyone else. Unlike you," she continued to rant, knowing exactly how to aim her verbal arrows. "In the Muggle world, it is okay to be gay. Gay marriage is legal, for Merlin's sake. There's discrimination, oh yes, but at least it's an open topic. Not something which is whispered behind closed doors. And I can see what you're thinking, Mum. Just because I defend the LGBT community, doesn't mean I'm gay. I wish I were a Muggle. I hate this family. To me, magic is a curse." She turned back to her father. "And you - you're so wrapped up in your work. You say you're constantly trying to create a better world for us to grow up in, but you haven't, have you? You were so focused on doing that that we grew up."

A tense silence fell over the kitchen.

Ginny cleared her throat. "Is there anything else you'd like to say, Lily?"

"I want to go to a Muggle school. I want a Muggle job."

"Why? Besides, it's impossible."

"It's not impossible." she countered. "There are wizards placed everywhere in the Muggle system. I've been giving myself a Muggle education for years. They could create a fake identity for me."

Harry sighed and looked at Ginny. "Your mother and I will have to talk about this."

"Hang on." Ginny held up a finger. "What Muggle job do you want?"

Lily shrugged. "Something to do with the brain. Memories."

"You could become an Obliviator." suggested Harry.

Lily rolled her eyes. "I want to try and restore memories, Dad, not remove them. It seems so - so destructive."

* * *

Lily didn't get her way. She finished Hogwarts, and went straight to France, not bothering to visit home. She stayed with Fleur's sister, Gabrielle, and trained as an Unspeakable. She had never attempted to make any contact with her parents. She sent owls to her siblings and cousins, congratulating them on their various marriages and births. She found it easier that way. It never gave her a chance to regret her decisions.

She sighed, remembering a quote which had hung over her desk for so many years.

"Never regret; if it's good, it's wonderful, if it's bad, it's experience." Victoria Holt, she thought. Lily wasn't sure what she had gained. Maybe she would eventually learn to stop shutting people out.

* * *

Harry, however, had learnt something. He tried to be more affectionate with his sons. It became easier once he had grandchildren. He had found interactions with his children to be so hard, yet love and affection came so easily to him when dealing with his children's children.

* * *

A/N: Written for the Quidditch League Fanfiction Competition

Genre: Post-war

Prompts: Easier and "Never regret. If it's good, it's wonderful, and if it's bad, it's experience.


End file.
